Chitrakoot 10th May 2006

“We don’t have Chicken Tandoori”
“Well can I have the Fish Tikka”?
“We don’t have Fish Tikka”
“Can I have the Mutton Roast”?
“Sir, we only have vegetable”
“Why, is the restaurant not open yet” (it’s 18:00)
“Yes sir, restaurant is open, but we only have vegetable”
“The menu says that you have meat dishes”
“Yes sir, we only have vegetable”.

“Ok, give me a minute and I’ll choose something, in the meantime can I have a milk coffee without sugar”?
“Without sugar sir”?
“Yes, without sugar”
“How many coffee’s would you like”?
I felt like saying one for me and three for my invisible friends
“Just the one please”

Waiter returns five minutes later with a milk coffee and sugar.
“Can I order two Masala Papad, one Vegetable Pulao and Vegetable Pakora”?
“Yes sir, would you like them now”?
This bloke could have entered Mastermind and his specialist subject could have been ‘Stating the Bleedin’ Obvious’
“Yes please”

It had been a long days ride getting here, I only covered 150kms, but it took me from 09:00, until 16:00. An average speed of just over 22 kilometres per hour! The road I was on was easily the worst road that I had ever ridden on. I’ve been on worse roads, the one from Poipet to Seim Reip springs to mind, but I wasn’t riding a motorbike at the time. The road had started off promising enough with one good size lane on either side, but after about 20 kilometres it narrowed down to a single lane (with a bit of pressed dirt on either side for vehicles to move onto when two meet. Which is ok when you are in a car, bus, lorry or cart, but not a lot of fun when manic bus drivers or four-wheel drives force you onto it. I lost count of the amount of times I found myself in the dirt and I nearly lost the front wheel on a couple of occasions.

The road improved again and turned into two lanes, 1 ½ for motor vehicles and a tiny strip for me! I then passed through a tiger reserve, I had seen the signs for it and I passed the entrance, but about five kilometres later I went by a sign which said that I was now in the reserve and please do not feed the animals! Like I was going to stop and share my leg with a tiger! The road was excellent as it twisted and turned into the hills, and I was able to motor along at 60kph. I was really enjoying it, but my joy didn’t last long as the road soon deteriorated to a pot-holed dirt track. Not a lot of fun to ride on.

After about twenty minutes the road got a bit better although I was still getting shaken to bits by the potholes I couldn’t avoid. I came to a T Junction and that was the time for me to take a left. I entered a small town and the road became a jumble of potholes again and I was going along at 10 kph. I came to a roundabout with two roads leading off it, both looked like ‘major’ roads so I had a 50-50 chance of getting it right. I took the right hand exit and came out the other side of the town about five minutes later, and the road soon deteriorated once again. I rode down the road and it gradually got worse until I was riding on loose rocks and dirt, the road didn’t look like getting better any time soon so I decided to head back to the roundabout and take the other turning, this detour cost me an hour.

I got back to the roundabout and stopped at a shop selling water, I bought two litres and filled up my water bottle. I asked the guy in the shop, which was the road to Chitrakoot, and he pointed to the road leading left. The road started out pretty good (for India) but soon ended up like the other roads I had been riding on today. It looked as though the roads hadn’t been surfaced since the Raj era. And then suddenly it was like I had woke from a nightmare, the road surface turned into fresh blacktop and I was able to zip along at 80 kph. There was little traffic loads of bends that I could see around and it was a joy to ride. I was riding this section of the road for twenty minutes and I came upon the road crew laying the road. There were about thirty men and women (mostly women) and it looked as though they were laying the tarmac by hand, they probably weren’t, but I was concentrating too much trying to weave through them to pay much attention. I feared that the road would deteriorate once again, but it was mainly good for the next fifty or so kilometres.

To cut a long story short, I eventually ended up in Chitrakoot at about 16:00 and was shattered. I had a ride through the town and could see nothing of interest. I had been told to go here by a number of people and my roadmap says that it is a place of interest. I booked in at the only hotel I could find, ‘Tourist Bungalow’ and got charged 450 Rupees (£5.60 GBP) for the pleasure. I had a shower and washed some clothes and watched a bit of TV before I went for a walk in the town. I had been told by various people that Chitrakoot is hassle free and really relaxing, I wonder how long ago they were here?

I came across the river and bathing Ghats and I was hassled by numerous people to take a boat ride, visit a temple or come to my shop. Impressed not I was (as Yoda would say). I also had numerous naked men say hello to me! I declined their polite offer of conversation and continued my walk along the Ghats. I got p1ssed off getting hassled and made my way back to the hotel and went to have something to eat in the restaurant.

The food, by the way, was excellent, really tasty. Whilst I was waiting I went to my room and got my laptop and started typing this blog. I had a look at the menu a couple of time whilst I was typing, just to double check what I had ordered. The staff seen me do this and the next thing I know, the manager comes to my table and introduces himself. He then brings the food out, the dumb waiter had disappeared, and the chef comes out five minutes later to introduce himself. The service was excellent and I’ve no doubt that they think I’m from the Lonely Planet or something similar, I must try this again! Speaking of the Lonely Planet, I lost my book today. I had it on the back of my bike secured with a bungee cord, but it must have came loose as I was bumping along, not that Chitrakoot is in the book mind you.

All in all, it was a waste of a day and if you’ve ever got a few days spare in India, don’t bother spending it here! I’m going to try and get to Varanassi tomorrow, which is about 300km away. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to make that in one day though, so I’ll see how I’m getting on by the time I reach Allahbad which is 135 kms away.